By Theodore Rothke
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I feel my fate in what I cannot fear.
I learn by going where I have to go.
We think by feeling. What is there to know?
I hear my being dance from ear to ear.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
Of those so close beside me, which are you?
God bless the Ground! I shall walk softly there,
And learn by going where I have to go.
Light takes the Tree; but who can tell us how?
The lowly worm climbs up a winding stair;
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
Great Nature has another thing to do
To you and me; so take the lively air,
And, lovely, learn by going where to go.
This shaking keeps me steady. I should know.
What falls away is always. And is near.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I learn by going where I have to go.
The title of this blog comes from Rothke’s poem, The Waking. My daughter died on May 16th, 2019. When I was in the hospital with her, this poem kept rolling in my head, over and over. “This shaking keeps me steady. I should know. What falls away is always. And is near.” That describes how I felt. I was shaking inside. I had things to do…decisions to make for Beck.
Growing up, I relied on books and poetry to help me understand life. As an English teacher, I taught my students to write their thoughts and feelings. This blog is for Rebecca Maria Gonzalez. I woke up this morning feeling like I may forget her, and I got scared. I’m going to write my thoughts and share photos–for you, but mostly for me, so I can look back and remember my girl.